


JOY (Just One Yesterday)

by Coraleeveritas



Category: A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst and Fluff and Smut, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-12
Updated: 2013-11-12
Packaged: 2018-01-01 05:56:56
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,632
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1041149
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Coraleeveritas/pseuds/Coraleeveritas
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Now, it seemed as if the angel had fallen, dirty and drunk on power, her fragile wings clipped by invading Lannister forces. <i>Corrupted</i>, Brienne thought and realised it wouldn't be a stretch to now apply the word to herself as well.</p>
<p>An attempt at making Fall Out Boy's Just One Yesterday into something Jaime/Brienne for the Shuffled Challenge.</p>
            </blockquote>





	JOY (Just One Yesterday)

**Author's Note:**

> So here's another attempt at producing a fic for the Shuffled challenge. The song was Just One Yesterday by Fall Out Boy and although this started life as a smutty argument it became something a lot longer and, hopefully, deeper. I can't say I'm totally sure I've actually kept this tonally to the lyrics (at the end) but the story took over and pulled me towards fluff.
> 
> Thank you as always to RoseHeart for her insights and fixes, this story wouldn't have gotten to this point without you :)
> 
> All characters belong to GRRM as usual, I'm just borrowing them for a little bit.

"If you just let me out here that'll be fine", Brienne calmly instructed the taxi driver as they rounded a corner only to be met by gridlocked traffic yet again. It was Halloween and on top of the normal festivities the council had given the go ahead for a fire festival to take place in the city centre, much to the chagrin of her former department, meaning the traffic had just about ground to a halt in all directions.  
   
"Are you sure, love?" The man glanced back at her as he pulled up to the curb, his dark eyes taking more time to consider her costume than Brienne was comfortable with. "You never know what's out there, tonight of all nights."  
   
Brienne knew exactly who and what was lurking out there tonight, and she neither feared nor mistrusted the revelers. It wasn't too long ago that she would have been out there directing the crowds, much preferring to work Halloween than New Year as she didn't have children or friends who were really interested in the night of mischief. Tonight was different, though, as so many things had changed in the past few months. And since Scotland Yard kept her well appraised of the places where walking alone would be dangerous, Brienne had no fear of spending twenty minutes striding along a crowded street.  
   
"I can take care of myself, thank you. Just here will be fine."  
   
The man took another look at her, an almost paternal level of concern wrinkling his forehead and adding years to his already receding hairline and greying beard. Brienne sighed inwardly, remembering a similar look on her father’s face when she had told him of her decision to move into the city. And there had been another one when she made Detective Inspector shortly before her twenty sixth birthday. Pulling out a handful of coins to pay the man Brienne realised that she really didn't want to admit thinking that whatever else was taken tonight it wouldn't be anything she didn't want. And if things headed in the same direction as they had every night for a while now, she wouldn't be seeing her own bed until the sun was making an appearance once again. It was that thought which forced Brienne to stick her hand out to formally introduce herself to the driver.  
   
"DI Brienne Tarth. This", she gestured awkwardly down at herself, trying to ignore the tiny stretchy skirt and fishnets that had been borrowed to make up the bottom half of the costume, "Used to be my uniform."  
   
He nodded, taking her hand over his shoulder and grimacing at what he must have seen as the stupidity of young women. "You be careful now."  
   
Brienne returned the nod, scrambling out of the back seat as best she could without exposing herself in her friend's skirt and watched as he turned to head back the way they had come. The traffic was still going nowhere and, after examining the lack of movement for a few seconds, she crossed the road to avoid a group of giggling girls tottering up the street in little more than lingerie and high heels. Brienne only hoped her friends had more sense than to leave their homes dressed like that.   
   
Up ahead the fire festival was in full swing, but her destination had the audacity to shine even brighter than the pagan flames. Years ago, while she was still at university, the night's meeting place had been an expansive but quaint pub called The Angel. It wasn't really a student place but Sansa had found it one night during fresher's week and after that, they never went anywhere else. Brienne could remember the lunchtime games of pool between lectures, disagreements that were soon forgotten as they sunk into the familiarity of deep green leather benches, and all the songs that graced the night air as they made their way home. They were five then; Sansa and Margaery, whom she'd known since high school, Margaery's brother Loras, Brienne and her best friend Renly. But that night, for the very first time, they would only be four.   
   
The Angel had been stripped down and refurbished a while back, opening as a flashy and seedy looking nightclub with a less than subtle moniker. The Lions Den wouldn't have been her first choice for a party, not least because of all the intimate knowledge she had on the owner, but Renly had forced their hands and Brienne wouldn't deny the dying wish of one of her closest friends.  
   
As the red and gold lights polluted the peace of her memories, Brienne couldn't help but think of the statue that had once guarded and blessed patrons, an angel caused to choke on her own halo as a new generation poured past the doors of the haven. Now, it seemed as if the angel had fallen, dirty and drunk on power, her fragile wings clipped by invading Lannister forces. _Corrupted_ , Brienne thought and realised it wouldn't be a stretch to now apply the word to herself as well.  
   
But, as if in memory of something that could never be brought back, two pretty women dressed as angels waited for her at the gates of hell.   
   
"I'm sorry", Brienne mumbled as she came into earshot of her friends, "The traffic was worse than rush hour."  
   
"It's only nine", Margaery picked out a pocket watch from her ample plumage covered cleavage with a smile, "We haven't really been here that long. Sansa, as usual, took forever to get dressed."  
   
"There were issues with the wings", Sansa rolled her shoulders, the movement tossing around miles of auburn hair and making a handful of feathers fall to the ground like forgotten tears of innocence. Brienne shivered at the thought, heaven's grief could only lead to hell's reign and through the golden doors was a well traveled road paved with good intentions.   
   
"We didn't think you would actually come in costume", Margaery linked her arm in Brienne's, almost dragging her forward, "What happened to the heels?"  
   
"I swore a vow I'd be here for Renly, not that I would wear anything I wasn't comfortable with. The skirt is bad enough."  
   
Margaery grinned at the mountain of a man who stood guard at the door, a world of privilege and wealth welcoming them in. She leant against Brienne as soon as the warmth made it apparent that the owner either really was going for a hellfire theme or he expected no one to be wearing many clothes. Her voice was merely a whisper as Margaery laughed at a silent joke, "It's ok to admit you dressed up for..."  
   
"Don't go there", Brienne shocked herself with the menace in her tone, Margaery being one of the few people she'd trusted with all her secrets. She immediately regretted the snap and smiled in apology to her friend, Brienne was more than a little tense and bringing her quiet but not really _quiet_ boyfriend into the picture wasn’t doing anything to help her state of mind.  
   
"So this isn't one of his fantasies? That skirt, handcuffs and you having your way with him?”  
   
She couldn’t even look at Margaery anymore, a wave of embarrassment allowing her face to match the colour of the soft furnishings in the club. "I wouldn't know."  
   
"One day soon I am going to want details about the two of you."  
   
Brienne blushed harder at the insistence; if she found the courage to spill anything more it could and would be brought up at a later date to be used as emotional blackmail. "There’s really nothing to tell."  
   
"Yeah right", Margaery scoffed, waving at her brother who clearly had been waiting for them for a while, judging by the scowls he was getting while seated alone in a blood red booth. "What's the great lion like between the sheets anyway?"  
   
 _Like an addiction_ , Brienne thought as she worked out a way to change the subject, _Like we both know he might end up being one of the worst lessons I’m ever going to learn but neither of us wants to stop_.   
   
But before she could answer the devil himself tapped her on the arm.  
   
"DI Tarth", Tyrion Lannister looked up at her in what Brienne assumed was mock fury, though the red face paint and horns were making it difficult to gage any real emotion. The owner had always found her amusing, but she’d never spent enough time with his younger brother to work out if he was like that with everyone or if she was a special case. "You do realise that this is a costume party and arriving as yourself is flaunting the rules."  
   
"I..." Brienne looked down at Tyrion and across at Margaery, wishing she had stayed at home instead and found a decent night's sleep in a cold bed.  
   
"He's requested that all rule breakers report directly to his office."  
   
Brienne's dark blue eyes went wide but Margaery only laughed, spinning on a heel as they caught sight of Sansa stumbling into Loras’ booth after being held up by a scarred bartender. "I think we really should have seen this one coming. Have fun, Brie, but come back for at least one drink before you spend another night finding rapture in Jaime's arms."  
   
"I should really stay with my friends", Brienne told Tyrion firmly while trying to ignore Margery, torn between an angel and a devil, though neither were truly acting with her best intentions in mind.  
   
"It's fine", Margaery waved her off. "Find some comfort, release some tension and come back to us later. You practically live with the man so I don't know why you want to keep it so quiet."  
   
"I should stay."  
   
Margaery rolled her eyes and put a hand on Brienne's shoulder, angling her away from Tyrion, "Stop being so hard on yourself, none of us blame you for Renly's death. You're allowed a life and a day off once in a while."  
   
Brienne dropped her head, the memory of that night and the regret she had carried after it forming tears behind her eyelids like sins she hadn't confessed yet. "I was with Jaime... when my best friend bled out in the street."  
   
"It was the middle of the night, sweetie", Margaery's hand became an arm and a hug. "Whatever you've been taught, sleeping beside the man you love doesn't mean you've let any of us down."  
   
"I swapped shifts so I could see him", Brienne whispered. "I should have been there. I should have stopped it."  
   
It was a random, meaningless piece of violence that took Renly from them. He was simply in the wrong place at the wrong time, caught in the crossfire while investigating a late night altercation that took a tragic turn. Brienne had changed her week around, Renly’s early mornings for her late's, and spent an uninterrupted evening with Jaime reminding her just how good his mouth was when he wasn’t preoccupied with finding new ways to irritate her. They ate dinner together for what seemed to be first time in weeks, made out well before desert and spent the rest of the night talking and making love, something languid and unhurried, neither of them having anywhere better to be than tangled up in the other. It was the night Brienne realised that living without him was going to be harder than living with him. Then the call came.  
   
There was nothing she could have done, Renly was dead by the time he got to the hospital, but the guilt descended in a haze of grief before Margaery whispered and cried into her ear from the other side of the city. Jaime held her as she wept, great hulking sobs that wracked her body, kissing her hair like she was a child awakening from a nightmare. The tears eventually gave way to hiccups, Jaime staying silent for the whole time as he made her drink something dark and bitter to help with the shock. And once she had cried herself dry, exhausted from the grief and feeling like it should have been _her_ , he put her back to bed.  
   
That was three months ago, shortly after The Angel had re-opened and Jaime had left her a key by the toaster in his kitchen. There was no note but even Brienne couldn’t mistake the implication, almost two years to the day since their dancing in the boxing ring had turned into ferocious kissing like it was something that should have been occurring every night, every morning and as much as possible in between. Jaime was making sure she knew where they stood, especially after her best friend wasn’t going to see another tomorrow, though he didn’t ask about it later, didn’t complain much when she chose his bed over her own, over and over again.  
   
It was also only a few days after Renly had joked that they should recreate the very first time they all got drunk together; properly drunk like it was some kind of rite of passage, on Halloween. Brienne could just about remember falling out of a taxi in the middle of the night, though the memory of her very first hangover was something she would rather have forgotten. She mentioned it to Margaery at the funeral discreetly and the brunette took it on herself to plan the whole event, including the vastly improved costumes.  
   
Now Margaery only smiled sadly at her silence, holding onto something Brienne chose not to notice. "You might not have the face of an angel but you've got just as much heart.  Sometimes I think Jaime is the only one keeping you from being torn apart", she paused, glancing between her brother and the devil at her back. "Leave it to me and San to prosecute the piece of shit that did this and let your misplaced guilt go. Renly wouldn’t want us to spend the night being all maudlin anyway. If he was here…”  
   
“We’d be on to our third drink already.” Brienne smiled, finally allowing herself to remember all the good times in a twenty year stretch during which she’d been his friend.  
   
“That’s the spirit”, Margaery crinkled her nose, her voice rising back to a normal volume, "Tyrion, she's all yours."  
   
Pulling her skirt down to a more respectable level, though she guessed it likely would end up on a floor before the night was over, Brienne slowly followed the little man through the exit intended for employees only. There was no security on that door and she doubted anyone would have stopped her even if there had been, despite the fact Brienne had never ventured into that particular lion's den before that night. She had changed her normal morning run to watch the place being demolished and built back up, knowing that whatever was going on inside wouldn’t be the same as what had been there before. If she’d asked then Jaime would probably have talked her through the refurbishments but Brienne couldn’t find it in her heart to see such a beloved place in tatters.  
   
Tyrion pointed at a corridor of red, indicating she should try the second door on the left and her heart suddenly jumped into an unsteady rhythm.  
   
"He's been waiting for you", Tyrion grinned up at her. "Since we've opened he's been waiting for you to show up."  
   
"Oh."  
   
"My brother does some crazy things for love, sometimes I wonder if this place isn't just another one of them."  
   
The sudden rush of nerves caused by Tyrion's words betrayed her general sense of calm as Brienne knocked and waited for a familiar voice to purr for her to enter. She hadn't been lying or acting like a martyr when she'd told Margaery she wanted to stay with them. Since his death, Renly and Jaime had become one big mess of guilt and lust in her head.   
   
"You took your time, we opened in August." With an easy smile on his face, Jaime ran his eyes down her costume as Brienne entered the room, heat blooming under her skin as his eyebrows rose to take in the length of her skirt and the tiny holes in her tights. "Have you come to arrest me or fuck me?"  
   
"I've never arrested you." She tried to surreptitiously manoeuvre her legs into a position where Jaime wouldn't be staring at something he'd been very vocal about in the past, especially when they’d been wrapped around his back.  
   
Jaime folded his arms across his chest as his smile widened, finding some amusement in her discomfort. He was casually gorgeous as usual, having found a suit that looked like it had walked straight off the set of a mid century gangster film. "That doesn't mean you haven't wanted to", he leant back a little further in his chair, slipping into an accent that matched the costume perfectly as he ran a hand through perfect golden curls. "I'm bad news baby."  
   
Brienne rolled her eyes behind closed eyelids, hoping it would act as a calming influence as she leant her head back against the mahogany wall of his office.  
   
"And I think you enjoyed my cock so much yesterday you're here for a repeat performance."  
   
"Jaime!"  
   
"Brienne", his voice was as silky as his sheets, the memory of their fiercely desperate coupling the previous night coming back to shiver through her muscles and gnaw between her thighs. "Brienne", her name was savoured on his tongue as the air shifted and Jaime began to stalk towards her, becoming nothing more than a caged predator. "Brienne, why are you here tonight?"  
   
"My friends thought it would be a good idea for me to... with you."  
   
"That's not an answer." Jaime's breath ghosted over her skin, close enough now for his lips to smother her neck with wanted attention, biting and bruising, claiming her skin roughly as if knowing exactly where to touch to make her speak. She purred only encouraging nonsense as his eager hands removed her protective vest, cupping at her breasts through the ridiculously thin shirt. Margaery had told her to forget, to let go and as usual his hands were already clouding up her mind. "And for future reference, I don't appreciate waking up alone."  
   
Brienne bit her lip, determined not to mutter anything that would appear to be too much of an acquiescence of her growing desire, even as Jaime started to undo stubborn buttons with his teeth, her hands stroking up and down his back. "I'm supposed to be the one that's the disappointment, remember? There's not enough space in our bed for you to copy a lifetime of bad habits."  
   
Jaime fluttered kisses over the skin he had uncovered, dipping down to mouth at her budding nipples through expensive looking lace, which had been a birthday present he’d enjoyed a little more than Brienne had. As he bit at her playfully, making her pull at his hair instead of crying out, she realised that her choice in underwear alone meant that the night was more than just a send off for Renly. It had to be about Jaime too and her fear that another man she loved would be ripped away from her. Though Jaime remained oblivious to her epiphany, settling in to suckle her into a state of uncontrollable need and when his teeth tugged a second time she couldn't hold back, her moan becoming his name in her mouth.  
   
"Again", Jaime demanded, swirling his tongue across her chest with a groan of his own as Brienne hooked a leg around him and bucked against his obvious arousal a little too enthusiastically.  
   
"Jaime."  
   
He spoke into her skin, making sure to hum and purr around sensitive spots he knew too well. "I've always wanted to fuck you on my desk but you've never given me the opportunity until now."  
   
"I'm not..."  
   
"Why did you come if not to come?" He smiled smugly and Brienne had half a mind to punch the look off his face, the other half wantonly desperate to tear off his clothes and christen his desk like they had done with every flat surface in his house and a few in hers. Brienne had days where she hated the way she wanted him, the way he wanted her, wishing she could give her love to him but could only watch as she took it away. Even if somehow the clock could be turned back to give just one more yesterday with Renly, the way she felt about Jaime wouldn't be any different.  
   
And after everything, Brienne didn't know how not to be honest with him anymore, "I don't know."  
   
Jaime pushed her a little more into the wall, covering her body with his and finally starting to kiss Brienne properly. "Why don't you start with why you disappeared this morning?"  
   
"You can't", she took in a breath as he started to trail fingertips down her rib cage, clearly in a more affectionate mood than normal if they were going to kiss and touch their way through such an important issue. "Tell me those kinds of things and not expect me to want to report them."  
   
"Anything I say can and will be held against me.” Jaime laughed into her neck, sending vibrations through her muscles and Brienne knew that despite her annoyance, she was beginning to swell for him, feeling like she was seconds away from taking his hand and pushing it between her legs. If only Jaime hadn't ruined the moment.  
   
"It's not a joke!" She spat and shoved him carefully away but Jaime only took a step back to regard her from a seat at the end of his desk, legs spread in a show of pure arrogance.  
   
"You knew who I was when we met. What I’d done. You’ve known the details for months."  
   
"It still matters, Jaime, you're not who you make yourself out to be. You are not a villain. If one of my guys took down a terrorist like you did, then they would be a hero."  
   
"A hero?" he questioned with a bitter laugh, "I spent years in prison working out who I am. You just want to see the good in people so much you've come up with a new persona for me. The White Knight."  
   
"I wouldn't love you if you weren't a good man."  
   
"Stupid girl", Jaime shook his head but it was a gesture filled with so much love, Brienne had to blink away the surprise at seeing it raw and real in his eyes. “This isn’t really about me is it? Why don't you just let it out, Brienne?"  
   
“Let what out?”  
   
“Renly”, Jaime spoke the name like a curse, something that had come between them. "You can’t blame it on  his death when you decide to walk away if I ask you to marry me again."  
   
Her heart stopped for a second but her blood remained too hot to simply give in to his prodding, her mind stuck on the reasons why Jaime didn’t know how much everything still hurt. "Do you expect me to fall to my knees and thank you for wanting to wed such an ugly beast of a woman?"  
   
"It's not like you haven't done it before," Jaime snarked, reminding her of so many joyfully hidden moments. It would have been different if Brienne didn't investigate murders by day and enjoyed bedding a convicted murderer every night, but the years together had become a slow fall into love's easy embrace and it was something she no longer wanted to escape.  
   
"Not tonight Jaime."  
   
"Brienne", he was softer that time, and though Jaime hardly ever uttered 'I love you' or 'forgive me', her name had become an entire emotional dictionary in just two syllables. She knew when he was angry, aroused or apathetic simply from the way Jaime called to her. "If you’re just about done, I’ve got something for you."  
   
Brienne suddenly wanted to take back all the truths and secrets, to trade all their tomorrows for another yesterday where nothing felt as real and as right as it did now. It was easier when she didn't know him, back before Jaime had walked into her life like she'd been waiting for him to sit down beside her at the gym and casually mention between insults that he was looking for a new boxing partner and she looked like she might be a match, back when she was in love with her gay best friend, when her father wasn't sick, when she didn't see death and decay everyday. "I'm sorry that I can't forget."  
   
"I'm not, it just means that the past two years have been more than just 'finding comfort and releasing tension'", he winked as she recognised Margaery's words. "Security cameras."  
   
Swallowing down the idea that he'd been spying on them, Brienne found her heart overruling her head again. "Of course they have."  
   
Jaime looked like she'd said something immensely profound as he reached into a desk drawer to pull out a perfect stone circle, a flattened hoop that was probably the weirdest attempt at an engagement ring Brienne had ever seen, setting it on the desk between them. "I think you'll find this belongs to you."  
   
She blinked at the gift, trying to find the words that would explain her utter confusion. "I don't understand."  
   
Jaime narrowed his eyes at her, emeralds sparkling like he didn't quite believe her naïveté and she was simply goading him into doing something deeply romantic. He shook his head as impatience won out, "Did you never wonder why I bought this place? This one in particular?"  
   
"You wanted to mock something I loved."  
   
"I wanted to give you back something that you loved”, Jaime stared up at her, making her feel like she was something precious even if his perfect face made Brienne think he should have been way out of her league. “I’ve had that damn thing since before I even had a desk. I would have asked you to come by but you’ve been so stubborn about this place that I had to wait for you to come to me.”  
   
Brienne glanced at the ring, her mind working overtime as Jaime simply waited. "The Angel?" She asked what felt like hours later but was probably only seconds.  
   
"It's in the basement. Unbesmirched, other than the halo obviously." He smirked but it quickly became something genuine as she picked up the stone and turned it over and over in her hands. "You don't have to choose yesterday over tomorrow. Some things aren't going to change."  
   
Brienne knew there would always be a pull in her towards a simpler life, but so many of her complications were things that she truly loved, including Jaime and his ridiculously murky past. Finding that it only took a couple of long strides to make her way towards his gigantic desk, easily solid enough for a time when they both wanted and needed something rough, Brienne let Jaime push up her skirt and pull her down into his lap. Her kisses were a mark of possession, hands tangling in his hair to allow every part of Jaime to sing out even as the guilt over Renly’s death began to slowly lift. Though Brienne knew, deep down, it would take some time before it disappeared completely.

But for now, her breath catching from the power behind his need to turn each kiss into a battle of wills, his fingers starting to tease and tear bigger holes into the net tights, Brienne merely nodded at the halo, "You should have led with that."

Jaime's words were sweeter than honey, asking her to believe that another tomorrow would be nothing to fear. "Next time I promise I will."

**Author's Note:**

> If by any chance you made it this far and liked it, please take a second to let me know. Thank you!!!!
> 
> Just One Yesterday
> 
> I thought of angels  
> Choking on their halos  
> Get them drunk on rose water  
> See how dirty I can get them  
> Pulling out their fragile teeth  
> And clip their tiny wings
> 
> Anything you say can and will be held against you  
> So only say my name  
> It will be held against you  
> Anything you say can and will be held against you  
> So only say my name
> 
> If heaven’s grief brings hell’s rain  
> Then I’d trade all my tomorrows for just one yesterday  
> (I know I’m bad news)  
> For just one yesterday  
> (I saved it all for you)  
> Oh, I want to teach you a lesson in the worst kind of way  
> Still I’d trade all my tomorrows for just one yesterday  
> (I know I’m bad news)  
> For just one yesterday  
> (I saved it all for you)  
> For just one yesterday
> 
> Letting people down is my thing, baby  
> Find yourself a new gig  
> This town ain’t big enough for two of us  
> I don’t have the right name  
> Or the right looks  
> But I have twice the heart
> 
> Anything you say can and will be held against you  
> So only say my name  
> It will be held against you  
> Anything you say can and will be held against you  
> So only say my name (name)
> 
> If heaven’s grief brings hell’s rain  
> Then I’d trade all my tomorrows for just one yesterday  
> (I know I’m bad news)  
> For just one yesterday  
> (I saved it all for you)  
> I want to teach you a lesson in the worst kind of way  
> Still I’d trade all my tomorrows for just one yesterday  
> (I know I’m bad news)  
> For just one yesterday  
> (I saved it all for you)  
> For just one yesterday
> 
> If I spilled my guts  
> The world would never look at you the same way  
> And now I’m here to give you all my love  
> So I can watch your face as I take it all away, away, away, ay ay ay
> 
> If heaven’s grief brings hell’s rain  
> Then I’d trade all my tomorrows for just one yesterday  
> (I know I’m bad news)  
> For just one yesterday  
> (I saved it all for you)  
> I want to teach you a lesson in the worst kind of way  
> Still I’d trade all my tomorrows for just one yesterday  
> (I know I’m bad news)  
> For just one yesterday  
> (I saved it all for you)  
> For just one yesterday


End file.
